Allow me to deflate your holiday spirit with my obnoxious and bitchy gift guide.

I like the holidays alright.  I get to hang out with my (expat) friends + family, fatten up on egg nog, do some fancy cookin', + deck the halls.  However, ATM + I really struggle with the gift-giving and receiving part.  We don't even exchange gifts with each other!  It's not even a thing for us + quite frankly, it's made our lives so much more pleasant.  Obviously, we can't get away with that with everybody.

I've got reservations compiling a list like this, because it's not an attempt to dump on anyone's thoughtfulness, but we've received an abundance of embarrassingly off the mark gifts that we immediately regifted or donated to charity without a second thought.  Our house is small + we work to not fill it with stuff.  This isn't a statement against our consumer culture and the insatiable desire to acquire more + more junk.  Well, maybe it is.  All I know is the whole affair gives me the blues.  But, if we're gonna do this, then let's do this properly.

Allow me to take the guess work out of it.  Here's a list of things we either need and use on the reg or things that we think are lovely and wouldn't mind taking up a little space in our home:

1.  Contribute to Rolling Jubilee on our behalf.  A little bit goes a long way.  As of right now, it's forgiven $7 million of distressed debt.  Such an uplifting movement! #occupy  

2.  Louise Erdrich's latest novel, The Round House.  ATM + I are big fans.  KMHD is too, so we can loan it to her when we're done.  

3.  Vinyl records are always good.  We've had our eye on this 2 Bears LP for quite some time now.  Too, Bikini Kill records are being re-released.  Mine went missing long ago.  How lovely it would be to have them replaced! Bikini Kill totally blew my delicate teenaged mind 20 years ago.  They still do, frankly.  (Do read Jessica Hopper's oral herstory of Bikini Kill for Spin magazine.) 

4.  Real maple syrup.

5.  LUSH products.  ATM uses the 'dirty' shaving cream and I adore snowcake soap or 'dirty' perfume.

6.  Any contributions to our eventual kitchen and bathroom renos would be greatly appreciated.  I took the pledge to Save The Pink Bathrooms.

7.  Yoga classes @ Blue Yoga Nyla.  

8.  Wine for me, Scotch for him.

9.  Nothing.  You don't have to get us anything.  Really.  Maybe we can buy each other drinks at the Capital?  A little peck under the mistletoe?  Cheers!

Quite honestly, I wish everyone came up with a list.  What is it you're hoping for Xmas?  World peace, right?  Maybe I can give your Santa a hint hint!